Lord of Earrings

Like any good Captain, I arrived at the summit about half an hour later than the time we were told to arrive there. Half an hour late is basically Standard Time for us. So it was at slightly later than the allocated time that I walked through the dark curtains, into the large room with a circular dais in the middle. Shockingly, the other eight members who had been summoned already stood there, waiting for me. 

“Nice of you to finally show up,” said Goldenpatch, wearing her famous golden eyepatch.

“You know me,” I replied. “Just running on Standard Time. You guys were all half an hour early.”

The other captains shook their heads and laughed. I looked around at them, furrowing my brow in confusion. Then I realised what had happened: each of them had already been given a pair of earrings. One captain wore a dazzling pair, each earring looking like the sun. Moon earrings adorned the ears of Hattie “Mad Eyes” Palmer. What kind did that leave for me?

From the other side of the room, a bright spotlight appeared, shining on a tall man who was covered head to toe in metal armour, somehow painted pitch black. He had a menacing helmet, which had two massive, decorative diamond earrings. 

“Hammond Gartside, for your tardiness, you shall receive the last pair of earrings I have available. Despite their lack of popularity, these half-moons are some of the most valuable earrings in the Melbourne CBD.”

I stepped forward to approach and found that the armoured figure towered over me. He held the earrings out with his gauntlet-covered hand. Quickly, I snatched the jewellery away and retreated to the dais, putting the earrings on. I took my place beside the others, as John Sparrow looked over us.

“These earrings shall guide you to the most wonderful treasure a captain can possess. Move quickly, in order to claim it before the others do. Let the hunt begin.”

I felt like I had probably missed some pretty important information, but apparently, I’m supposed to join in some treasure hunt now. What is this, The Incredible Race?

– Garth Ham