This really isn’t funny. Whoever is pulling this prank (however you are doing it) really needs to stop. I need to go back to my own body so that I can manage my marine welding business. This morning I woke up in the body of some weirdo with a dog almost as big as I am. The first thing I did was check my blog to see if someone had been magically transported into my own body, and sure enough, they had. Apparently, this guy, whose body I am now in, is called Lucian. If you’re reading this, Lucian, yes I did feed your dog. Also, please check my social media because I have sent you a message on there, although I had to create a new account (named Real Tommy) because apparently, you don’t use social media at all.
Listen, Lucian, we need to meet up and work this out, obviously. I don’t know how this has happened. Just please, for one day, try to manage my business of stainless steel marine fabrication. Near Melbourne, plenty of people rely on my services. If you need any advice, I’ll try to give it through a message. It’s not really that hard, especially since you should have my muscle memory. I tried to play some video games this morning and found that I was exceptionally good at them through muscle memory.
I know that managing a marine welding business without blowing up my boat might seem like a big task, but you shouldn’t actually have to do any welding. I take orders for the week on Monday, do the welding on Tuesday through to Thursday, and then on Friday I just give the orders back to my clients. For example, Murray from Caulfield should be coming for his fishing rod holders today. Simply find the boat along the docks that has had fishing rod holders recently installed and return it to Murray. It’s that easy. I’m sure you can manage it.
In the meantime, I’m going to work out how the heck I get to the Melbourne docks by public transport, because apparently, you don’t own a car.
– Lucian (formerly known as Tommy)